there's something about crawling into your own bed after being gone for a while.
there just is.

Her fever dream.

my first stab at digital photography.
I'm besotted, completely enamoured, with windows lately.

from the other day by the sea.
winter has me excited this year.
its usually so drab and difficult.
this time around
its just
sort of
sweet.
















































like a sugarplum.

also: I took my new dslr out for a spin, and its official: film will always be better than digital, end of story.
and it will always keep my heart.

Date: Nov 3, 2008 10:53 AM
Elisabeth saysTo: Jon Meador
did you know that when you're in love you can't fall asleep because reality is better than your dreams.


Jon Meador saysTo: Elisabeth
did you know that when you're in love with someone miles away you cant stay awake cause your dreams are the only times you are together.

(this was two years, two months ago.
and still, when I'm far from you, even on holidays, I remember it)

my days are so easy and careless
and I could write a novella on every moment because they are all so beautiful.
every second
is epically
heartful
easy
untameable

I am surrounded by people who are as magical as people can be.

there is no secret.
I wear yesterday's hair
and a smile that's wry
and kiss all of yesterday's cares goodbye.






























also, as of tonight I will own a DSLR, and am terrified that it will distract me from using film. send prayers and addoral.

the holidays are going to be difficult this year for my family, we'll get by, we always do, but there's so many unexpected financial issues that have come up, and I just wish there was something I could do.

anyway I'm going home next week and have eight thousand things to do before then.
I've been making my bedroom my haven. paper birds and photographs and quilts, yellow paint.

I'm reading Jane again. (Austen, for those of you who don't know me, a diehard fan) and it just increases my love for huge, imperfect, close families, particularly mine.
Jon will be driving up to meet me there, my entire soul in one house, it couldn't come sooner. My bloodline surrounds me with the most beautiful people. It can't be fair.

i always wanted to be the sugarplum fairy.






































tis the season.

"I am trying to sleep without you. Every dream I have is full of your eyes and legs and skin but behind them there's this dread because i know when i wake, the spot where i so vividly felt your warm breath and soft skin just moments before is really empty. You are so far from me. I love you with all my heart. Come back to me soon."

a message jonathan sent me while I was in europe.
ive not been sure when or how, but all i've known
is that I want to spend my life with him.
my life. every inkling.

really, I'm the luckiest girl.

the snow is falling on my eyelashes.

good to know that
you wern't quite lost at sea.